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You can find a complete chronological listing of the journal entries that make up "Words/Silence/Flesh," including links and short synopses here.
This one's for the lovely![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
caras_galadhon who needs something to make her smile this week. Hope this does the trick.
I was joking when I asked if it was safe to come in, if Sean and Miranda were talking about me, but Sean asking me how long I'd been there-which translates into "How much did you hear?"-made me wonder just what they had said about me.
Of course, Sean denied they had been when I pressed him on it. He called me a "self-absorbed arse," said they were talking about the goddamned car. Naturally, Miranda backed him up, and while I might have persuaded Sean to tell me on his own, I knew it was a lost cause with Miranda here. And then when Dave entered the conversation, all talk turned back to the car.
Miranda spent time mediating between Sean and Dave about the car incident. She made Dave apologize, then she turned a glare on Sean and elbowed him in the side when all he did was glower at Dave in response. His acceptance may not have been graceful, but it was polite. It's impressive how she can do that with Sean. Perhaps I can hire her on as a personal assistant in Sean management. She could help me out in so many ways.
I started when I heard my name. From Dave. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets, as he leaned against the doorframe. He gestured with a nod of his head to Sean, who was watching me intently. Expectantly. Then a bit impatiently. I was missing my cue here something fierce. They were...talking about the car. The... Oh. I pulled his keys out of my pocket and dropped them in Sean's hand.
I expected him to close his hand around them, expected another go 'round about the car. I did not expect him to let them fall on the bed or to close his fingers around my wrist. "Elskede?"
He pulled me down to him, against him. His green eyes dark as his fingers slipped into my hair, hand cupping the back of my head. "Banned, you bastard," he growled and then kissed me hard.
I could feel Miranda and Dave watching us, but I didn't care. I was too busy thinking of what to get banned from next, as the perks seem to outweigh the inconvenience. Perhaps the lawnmower. The washer. So many possibilities. Sean's hand left the back of my head, though the other remained closed around my wrist. One of his fingers traced light circles against the inside of my wrist, the sensation at odds with the firm grip of his other fingers.
Right about then Miranda tried to slip off the bed unnoticed. It was enough for Sean to notice but not for him to let me loose. No, he just leaned over to kiss her cheek, then a little more to bring his lips close to her ear as he said, "Love you, Mir, but never fuck on the hood of my car again." She tensed, had to be at the touch rather than the words. I don't know if she was aware she did. But Dave was. And so was Sean.
She laughed and winked at Sean. "Promise. Not unless it's with you."
"Hmm. Not on the hood, no." The words were murmured absently as Sean's attention was shifting back to me.
Not on the hood? That did leave open the possibility of other places, didn't it? I might have been able to think it over more if he didn't bring my hand to his lips and kiss the spot on my wrist where his thumb had been rubbing.
Miranda wandered over to Dave. I can remember them talking quietly, but I'll be damned if I can recall a single word. Sean stood, taking care to run his body up along mine as he did. His eyes never left mine as his fingers tightened just a little more around my wrist. Not enough to hurt or be a threat. More of a promise. When he felt me shiver, he smiled and stepped away to hunt down clothes for the others.
While they were in wardrobe negotiations, I slipped out of my clothes. Miranda and Sean didn't seem to notice as they rummaged through the closet, but I could feel Dave's eyes on me. Dave watches too much. Maybe he thinks that other people don't notice, but the intensity of it is hard to miss.
Their clothing negotiations concluded, Sean turned back toward me. "Believe I was in the middle of..." His words faltered as his eyes widened. "...banning you." However, it didn't take long for them to narrow speculatively, a slight smile tugging at his lips. "Hmm." His hands settled on my hips, fingers gripping me hard. "Planning on a shower, love? Or you just like getting naked in front of guests?"
I liked getting naked in front of him, liked watching what it did to him. Didn't matter if other people were around. Well, at least not Miranda or Dave. Sean must not have felt quite as comfortable with that, since he sent them off with directions to clean towels in the linen closet.
At Miranda's parting quip of having seen it before, Sean sighed, rested his head on my shoulder. He let go of my hips and slipped his arms around me to pull me against him. "Too accommodating by far," he murmured. "Should start charging."
I wasn't sure if he was angry or sad, so I returned his hug, pressing against his as I kissed the side of his neck. He sighed softly as he ran the tips of his fingers up and down my spine. When I told him it was because I wanted a shower, he nodded and moved away to sit on the bed. Damn. He looked disappointed? Hurt? It shouldn't be that hard for me to tell. It never used to be.
I tried not to think too much about that as I dug through a pile of clothes I hadn't gotten around to putting away.
"Christ, Vig." Sean shook his head. "Is anything clean under there?"
Actually, most of the pile was clean, and I told him so as I tossed a pair of jeans on the bed. I meant to put it all away, nice and neat and proper, before Sean came back. Okay, I just planned on opening up the big bottom drawer and shoving it all in so that the chaos was contained and hidden. Just never got the chance.
After a bit of muttering, I heard a sharp intake of breath. "Hey, isn't that mine?"
Fuck. I froze. It was one of his shirts. I tried to evade, but he wouldn't allow it, just kept pressing, wanting to know why I had them, what I was doing with them. Truth is that I was only going to stuff the clothes in the drawer to avoid the conversation we were now having. Pride fought a quick battle with honesty and lost as I mumbled something about sleeping in them, which I had been. But I didn't want him knowing.
He said something too soft for me to hear as I dumped the clothes in his lap and headed for the bathroom. "Should get cleaned up."
"Viggo?" His voice stopped me, but I didn't turn around. "Did I say something I shouldn't have?" His voice was...tentative, as he came up behind me, not quite touching but close enough to make my skin tingle. Leaning forward, he rested his forehead against my back. "I'm sorry."
I shook my head, made a little gesture to dismiss that. I was angry with myself, not him. Embarrassed to be caught like some dog needing to curl around a piece of clothing to convince itself its family is coming home again. Pathetic. I muttered something like that without turning in his arms.
Sean made soft sounds as he nuzzled the side of my neck. "Annoying as fuck, yes," he murmured. "Difficult bastard, yes. Obtuse and obscure, yes. Pathetic? No. Absolutely not."
I sighed and relaxed against him, running my hands over his arms and pulling them tighter around me. He obliged, even pulled me with him back toward the bed, though his misjudged the distance and we ended up falling into it.
Lying next to me, he leaned up on his elbows and just stared at my face with that half intense, half distracted look I've been told I get when I'm painting. I was just about to break the silence when he said, "I missed you too, you know. Painfully. Wouldn't have skipped seeing the girls for the world, but I woke up a lot in the middle of the night, forgetting for just a moment that you weren't there. Reached for you in the dark, but found myself with a fistful of sheets instead. It hurt, being alone. Hard to breathe when your chest tightens up." He shrugged then, and smiled just a little. But it was enough. "Maybe if I'd been smart enough to take something of yours along with me it wouldn't have been so bad. Smart man, my Viggo."
I smiled, kissed him lightly. "My elskede."
If I was smart, I'd have gotten up and run to the shower then, when things were right between us. But I didn't. I promised to put his things away before he reminded me. Again. Somehow talking about his shirts led us to talking about my art and what people thought about it. And I said I didn't care about that. When I create, I do it for me. I hope that people will want to see it and get something from it, but that isn't my first motivation.
Except whatever we were talking about wasn't my art, because Sean frowned and started talking about how I don't care, except that I do, but I don't. Not really. Because it was important to him, I tried to figure it out, but I couldn't. When I told him that I cared about what the people I loved or respected thought, he just got upset and brushed off the whole thing.
"I don't..." He breathed out in a heavy sigh and looked away from me. "I don't think I want to talk about this anymore, Viggo."
I've also learned that sometimes there isn't anything you can do to make him budge on something. This was one of those times. As badly as I wanted to argue or demand, all I did was turn his face back to me and kiss him gently. "Fine. We won't talk about it anymore right now." Another kiss. "But we are going to talk about it, elskede."
"I'd rather not." He sighed. "What do we do with Dave and Mir?"
Nice evasion, elskede. I raised an eyebrow. "Do with them? Make them a nice cup of tea and send them on their way? What do you want to do with them, Sean?"
I wasn't surprised that he didn't know, especially because bringing them up was supposed to distract me. Since he wanted me to move on to something else, I let myself be redirected. For now. Sean feels a little guilty about car. Unwinding. Viggo good. Pictures with them. So lovely. So naked.
He nods. "Suppose it would be unprofessional if I observed."
"I don't have a problem with it." Pause. "Maybe even..." When I hesitated again, he touched my chest, his fingertips drawing lazy circles on my skin as he licked his lips and asked me to tell him. I sighed and then said, very quietly, "Maybe even get a few with you too."
He smiled then while his fingers kept tracing idle patterns on my skin. It was a gentle tease, we both knew it, and my body tightened in anticipation of what he would do next. "Don't you have enough of those already?" he asked.
There are some things you can never have enough of. Pictures of Sean are one of those things, and I told him so.
"You could always do those in a separate session, though, couldn't you?" He smirked as he shifted closer and ducked his head to lick at the skin he'd been touching.
One of my hands slid across his shoulder and up his neck, fingers slipping into his hair. "Not if I want some of the three of you."
He murmured something that wasn't quite a yes or no against my skin. So I had to ask. "You okay with that?"
Sean went quiet against me and much as I wanted to fill that silence, I didn't. When he finally spoke, he sounded surprised by his own words, "Yeah. Yeah, I am." He trailed a line of kisses up my chest and then bit down on my shoulder before whispering in my ear, "Although it doesn't sound like you've had enough inspiration yet."
I chuckled as I ran my his hands up and down his sides. "Trust me, elskede, you more than inspire me."
He looked at me then, gave me a bright smile that made me sorry I didn't have a camera at hand to capture it. "Hmm. Well, I suppose it's not Tuesday then."
Tuesday? "No, it's...Thursday." Damn it. Was there something I was supposed to do next Tuesday? Something he'd be annoyed to have to remind me about? I almost groaned. Or something I forgot to do last?
"No, wait." Sean's brow furrowed as he ran his fingers through his hair. "It's a good thing that it's not Tuesday. Possibly."
Good thing? Hmmm, then I didn't forget something. Except I must have, because Sean was talking like I should know what he meant, but I didn't. So I asked. "What are you talking about?"
"You know, the Blades aren't playing today."
Soccer... Fuck. Was I supposed to tape a game for him? "I suppose not," I said slowly, "or we wouldn't be having this conversation." I watched him closely, searching for some clue about where this was going. "You'd be watching the game."
"Mmm. And you'd be pissing me off, suddenly desperate to talk after being silent for hours." His fingers slipped into my hair as he pulled me to him for a deep lingering kiss.
I laughed and agreed with him. Bastard knew me too well by far. But my heart wasn't in it. It was way far back in line behind all the other parts of me that were fixed on Sean's tugging me back into our bed and fucking me into blissful exhaustion.
"You're in denial." He whispered the words against my lips.
"What? About soccer?"
"Football. That too. But I meant your tendency to pick truly inappropriate moments to talk about world events." He watched me carefully, a slight shake of my hear and he knew I had no idea where this was going. "You want him." Sean's fingers were still in my hair, stroking, and I had to fight to keep my eyes open as I asked him who. He chuckled and nipped at my lip. "The man hell-bent on destroying my car."
"Dave?" I shook my head. "No. Don't need him."
"I didn't say 'need'. I said 'want'. Don't you listen?" The slightest edge of exasperation crept into his voice as he ran his fingers through his hair. "No, wait, I know the answer to that one."
I just stared at him for some time that I hoped wasn't shorter than it felt to me. "Fine." I shrugged. "I've looked a time or two."
"I know. I'm remarkably not blind. You want. And it's not Tuesday, I'm not watching the game, and I'm here." Sean's voice dropped to that soft, dark purr on his last words, a sound that always cut through me, made me shiver. I had to remind myself to breathe as his lips brushed mine, while his fingers caressed the nape of my neck.
"You're..." When my voice faltered, I cleared my throat, wet my lips, and tried again. "You're assuming he'd even be interested."
Sean snorted and shook his head. "I told her you're oblivious." He blushed, just a little, as he coughed and looked away from me.
"I'm...? You told...?" The piece clicked into place. "Miranda." I blinked, shook my head slightly. "The two of you talked about Dave and I fucking?"
"What?" It was Sean's turn to blink. "No, you daft Yank! Christ, I'm going to give up talking to you, and just leave notes on the fridge."
Okay, so maybe the piece didn't quite fit.
"Try and follow, all right?" His hands closed around mine as he met my eyes, waiting until he was sure he had my attention. "Miranda and I didn't talk about you and Dave. I may have"-a pause as he closed his eyes, frowning as he searched for the right words--mmm, mentioned you in conversation. Not you and Dave."
Mentioned...me? But not Dave. What were they talking about? Sean wasn't going to tell me. I wondered if Miranda would.
Sean sighed, then nodded. I knew from his look that nod was in response to something he was thinking, not directed toward me. He locked his gaze with mine. "But I can see that he wants you. Just as much as you want him -- maybe more. So take him."
"Take him?" I closed my eyes, my hands tightening around Sean's as I remembered the feeling of Dave just barely touching me in the driveway. Tempting. Maybe too tempting. "Take him. Just like that?"
"Does it have to be any more complicated than that?"
Complicated? Everything about Sean was complicated now. The worst kind of complicated too. The kind that looks so obvious and easy on the surface, and you never realize how wrong that is until it's too late. I shrugged and gave him a small smile. "I'll think about it."
"Of course." Sean leaned close, his breath ghosting across my lips, though he didn't quite kiss them. He waited for me to open my eyes before adding. "It is a limited time offer, though, love." Never as simple as it seems on the surface. "We talked about this. I'm not comfortable with leaving it open at all times."
I nodded, though I wasn't sure what he meant. I was only sure that I couldn't afford to fuck up.
Maybe Sean knew that, sensed it, because he cleared his throat. "Not without me. You said."
That was easy enough to agree to. Well, technically, I already had earlier in the garden, though that was in less specific terms. "Never without you."
Sean smiled, it was a one of the genuinely happy ones that made the corners of his eyes crinkle. "Good, then." Freeing one hand from mine, he ran his fingers along my jaw, brushed his thumb over my lips. "You want, you take." There was the slightest pause before he murmured. "You're damn good at that anyway. So do it."
Good at it? I don't think that I frowned. Maybe I was wrong, but I thought that following that thread of conversation might lead us to...unhappy places. And I'd been in too many of them lately to willing wander into another. "I'm going to take a shower." I brushed a light kiss across his lips. "And think about it. Okay?"
Sean nodded as he let me loose, and I stepped closer until our bodies were touching, slipped my arms around him, holding him tightly against me and I kissed him. Fierce. Hard. So sweet as his eyes drifted closed. So sweet as he sighed as our lips parted, tongue swiping across his own lips. "Love you," he murmured in a rough, husky whisper.
"Love you too, elskede. More than I can say." More than he will probably ever know.
Sean grinned as he shoved me toward the bathroom. "Go. Shower."
I promised I wouldn't use up all the hot water. I hoped Miranda and Dave would be so kind as to do the same. Honestly, I didn't think that would be a difficult promise to keep, not until I was standing under the water, hearing Sean say, Take him, as my hands moved over my body. Take him. My fingers curled around my cock, and I stroked myself as I imagined fucking Dave while Sean fucked me. Following those thoughts to their natural conclusion, however, would surely mean that Sean's shower would be less than hot. And I did promise. Sadly.
After a quick toweling off, the towel still draped over one shoulder as I rubbed at my hair, I stepped into the doorway and froze. Sean was leaning over Miranda, running his hands up her arms. She'd just said something about shagging all of them rotten, I believe. While that sounded like a nice offer to me, I'm sure that it sounded even better to Sean. He pitched his voice low as he answered her in his dark sinful "I'm going to fuck you until you can't stand" tone, though the only word I heard was "lovely," that as he shifted close enough to almost kiss her. Her lips parted, and I wondered if they would mind if I touched myself while I watched. At the last moment, Sean stiffened and pulled back, and I thought I heard my name.
When I cleared my throat, Sean whirled around. "Viggo!" He looked from me to Miranda and then back to me as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. Clearly, I was not the only one who wanted, though Sean didn't precisely want Dave.
"Please," I said, "carry on." I couldn't help laughing at the stunned looks on their faces. "Though I in the interest of fairness"-I nodded to Miranda--"I think I should go fetch Dave so he can watch too."
Miranda blinked at me, and I fought the urge to laugh. It took a lot to take Miranda off guard. Though I suppose mentioning Dave probably helped. A little.
"You're sure?" Sean was still desperately trying to look at both Miranda and I and at neither of us at the same time. My skittish elskede. When I got to his side, I wrapped an arm around him and leaned against him as I kissed him. "You wouldn't ask that if you were standing where I was watching what I was watching." However, he didn't look convinced by words alone. The sacrifices I make for him.
He watched me speculatively as I reached out with my free hand and snagged some of Miranda's hair to pull her to me. I brushed my lips across hers teasingly before I kissed her. "Though I might like to have a raincheck on that offer to shag me rotten." She gave me a look as I chuckled and nipped at her lip. "Not sure you'll be up to it after you're finished with him."
She called me an arrogant prick. Arrogant? Me? That was...unfair. I was, after all, just being honest. Direct. For some reason, Miranda didn't look convinced. Well, I suppose I would leave it to Sean to prove how honest I was being. With a last grin and a promise I wouldn't be long, I slipped out of the room.
The walk to the guest bathroom never seemed so long.
I could just see Dave's silhouette through the curtain as he hummed tunelessly over the sound of the water. It was just loud enough that he didn't notice me pull aside the curtain. Either that or he thought it was Miranda and was playing dumb. Take him.
I followed the path of the water as I watched it run down his shoulders, back, ass, thighs. It would be so easy to step in behind him, curl one hand around his cock as I bent him over to fuck him. I drew a deep breath and released it before I reached for Dave.
Take him.
This one's for the lovely
caras_galadhon who needs something to make her smile this week. Hope this does the trick. I was joking when I asked if it was safe to come in, if Sean and Miranda were talking about me, but Sean asking me how long I'd been there-which translates into "How much did you hear?"-made me wonder just what they had said about me.
Of course, Sean denied they had been when I pressed him on it. He called me a "self-absorbed arse," said they were talking about the goddamned car. Naturally, Miranda backed him up, and while I might have persuaded Sean to tell me on his own, I knew it was a lost cause with Miranda here. And then when Dave entered the conversation, all talk turned back to the car.
Miranda spent time mediating between Sean and Dave about the car incident. She made Dave apologize, then she turned a glare on Sean and elbowed him in the side when all he did was glower at Dave in response. His acceptance may not have been graceful, but it was polite. It's impressive how she can do that with Sean. Perhaps I can hire her on as a personal assistant in Sean management. She could help me out in so many ways.
I started when I heard my name. From Dave. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets, as he leaned against the doorframe. He gestured with a nod of his head to Sean, who was watching me intently. Expectantly. Then a bit impatiently. I was missing my cue here something fierce. They were...talking about the car. The... Oh. I pulled his keys out of my pocket and dropped them in Sean's hand.
I expected him to close his hand around them, expected another go 'round about the car. I did not expect him to let them fall on the bed or to close his fingers around my wrist. "Elskede?"
He pulled me down to him, against him. His green eyes dark as his fingers slipped into my hair, hand cupping the back of my head. "Banned, you bastard," he growled and then kissed me hard.
I could feel Miranda and Dave watching us, but I didn't care. I was too busy thinking of what to get banned from next, as the perks seem to outweigh the inconvenience. Perhaps the lawnmower. The washer. So many possibilities. Sean's hand left the back of my head, though the other remained closed around my wrist. One of his fingers traced light circles against the inside of my wrist, the sensation at odds with the firm grip of his other fingers.
Right about then Miranda tried to slip off the bed unnoticed. It was enough for Sean to notice but not for him to let me loose. No, he just leaned over to kiss her cheek, then a little more to bring his lips close to her ear as he said, "Love you, Mir, but never fuck on the hood of my car again." She tensed, had to be at the touch rather than the words. I don't know if she was aware she did. But Dave was. And so was Sean.
She laughed and winked at Sean. "Promise. Not unless it's with you."
"Hmm. Not on the hood, no." The words were murmured absently as Sean's attention was shifting back to me.
Not on the hood? That did leave open the possibility of other places, didn't it? I might have been able to think it over more if he didn't bring my hand to his lips and kiss the spot on my wrist where his thumb had been rubbing.
Miranda wandered over to Dave. I can remember them talking quietly, but I'll be damned if I can recall a single word. Sean stood, taking care to run his body up along mine as he did. His eyes never left mine as his fingers tightened just a little more around my wrist. Not enough to hurt or be a threat. More of a promise. When he felt me shiver, he smiled and stepped away to hunt down clothes for the others.
While they were in wardrobe negotiations, I slipped out of my clothes. Miranda and Sean didn't seem to notice as they rummaged through the closet, but I could feel Dave's eyes on me. Dave watches too much. Maybe he thinks that other people don't notice, but the intensity of it is hard to miss.
Their clothing negotiations concluded, Sean turned back toward me. "Believe I was in the middle of..." His words faltered as his eyes widened. "...banning you." However, it didn't take long for them to narrow speculatively, a slight smile tugging at his lips. "Hmm." His hands settled on my hips, fingers gripping me hard. "Planning on a shower, love? Or you just like getting naked in front of guests?"
I liked getting naked in front of him, liked watching what it did to him. Didn't matter if other people were around. Well, at least not Miranda or Dave. Sean must not have felt quite as comfortable with that, since he sent them off with directions to clean towels in the linen closet.
At Miranda's parting quip of having seen it before, Sean sighed, rested his head on my shoulder. He let go of my hips and slipped his arms around me to pull me against him. "Too accommodating by far," he murmured. "Should start charging."
I wasn't sure if he was angry or sad, so I returned his hug, pressing against his as I kissed the side of his neck. He sighed softly as he ran the tips of his fingers up and down my spine. When I told him it was because I wanted a shower, he nodded and moved away to sit on the bed. Damn. He looked disappointed? Hurt? It shouldn't be that hard for me to tell. It never used to be.
I tried not to think too much about that as I dug through a pile of clothes I hadn't gotten around to putting away.
"Christ, Vig." Sean shook his head. "Is anything clean under there?"
Actually, most of the pile was clean, and I told him so as I tossed a pair of jeans on the bed. I meant to put it all away, nice and neat and proper, before Sean came back. Okay, I just planned on opening up the big bottom drawer and shoving it all in so that the chaos was contained and hidden. Just never got the chance.
After a bit of muttering, I heard a sharp intake of breath. "Hey, isn't that mine?"
Fuck. I froze. It was one of his shirts. I tried to evade, but he wouldn't allow it, just kept pressing, wanting to know why I had them, what I was doing with them. Truth is that I was only going to stuff the clothes in the drawer to avoid the conversation we were now having. Pride fought a quick battle with honesty and lost as I mumbled something about sleeping in them, which I had been. But I didn't want him knowing.
He said something too soft for me to hear as I dumped the clothes in his lap and headed for the bathroom. "Should get cleaned up."
"Viggo?" His voice stopped me, but I didn't turn around. "Did I say something I shouldn't have?" His voice was...tentative, as he came up behind me, not quite touching but close enough to make my skin tingle. Leaning forward, he rested his forehead against my back. "I'm sorry."
I shook my head, made a little gesture to dismiss that. I was angry with myself, not him. Embarrassed to be caught like some dog needing to curl around a piece of clothing to convince itself its family is coming home again. Pathetic. I muttered something like that without turning in his arms.
Sean made soft sounds as he nuzzled the side of my neck. "Annoying as fuck, yes," he murmured. "Difficult bastard, yes. Obtuse and obscure, yes. Pathetic? No. Absolutely not."
I sighed and relaxed against him, running my hands over his arms and pulling them tighter around me. He obliged, even pulled me with him back toward the bed, though his misjudged the distance and we ended up falling into it.
Lying next to me, he leaned up on his elbows and just stared at my face with that half intense, half distracted look I've been told I get when I'm painting. I was just about to break the silence when he said, "I missed you too, you know. Painfully. Wouldn't have skipped seeing the girls for the world, but I woke up a lot in the middle of the night, forgetting for just a moment that you weren't there. Reached for you in the dark, but found myself with a fistful of sheets instead. It hurt, being alone. Hard to breathe when your chest tightens up." He shrugged then, and smiled just a little. But it was enough. "Maybe if I'd been smart enough to take something of yours along with me it wouldn't have been so bad. Smart man, my Viggo."
I smiled, kissed him lightly. "My elskede."
If I was smart, I'd have gotten up and run to the shower then, when things were right between us. But I didn't. I promised to put his things away before he reminded me. Again. Somehow talking about his shirts led us to talking about my art and what people thought about it. And I said I didn't care about that. When I create, I do it for me. I hope that people will want to see it and get something from it, but that isn't my first motivation.
Except whatever we were talking about wasn't my art, because Sean frowned and started talking about how I don't care, except that I do, but I don't. Not really. Because it was important to him, I tried to figure it out, but I couldn't. When I told him that I cared about what the people I loved or respected thought, he just got upset and brushed off the whole thing.
"I don't..." He breathed out in a heavy sigh and looked away from me. "I don't think I want to talk about this anymore, Viggo."
I've also learned that sometimes there isn't anything you can do to make him budge on something. This was one of those times. As badly as I wanted to argue or demand, all I did was turn his face back to me and kiss him gently. "Fine. We won't talk about it anymore right now." Another kiss. "But we are going to talk about it, elskede."
"I'd rather not." He sighed. "What do we do with Dave and Mir?"
Nice evasion, elskede. I raised an eyebrow. "Do with them? Make them a nice cup of tea and send them on their way? What do you want to do with them, Sean?"
I wasn't surprised that he didn't know, especially because bringing them up was supposed to distract me. Since he wanted me to move on to something else, I let myself be redirected. For now. Sean feels a little guilty about car. Unwinding. Viggo good. Pictures with them. So lovely. So naked.
He nods. "Suppose it would be unprofessional if I observed."
"I don't have a problem with it." Pause. "Maybe even..." When I hesitated again, he touched my chest, his fingertips drawing lazy circles on my skin as he licked his lips and asked me to tell him. I sighed and then said, very quietly, "Maybe even get a few with you too."
He smiled then while his fingers kept tracing idle patterns on my skin. It was a gentle tease, we both knew it, and my body tightened in anticipation of what he would do next. "Don't you have enough of those already?" he asked.
There are some things you can never have enough of. Pictures of Sean are one of those things, and I told him so.
"You could always do those in a separate session, though, couldn't you?" He smirked as he shifted closer and ducked his head to lick at the skin he'd been touching.
One of my hands slid across his shoulder and up his neck, fingers slipping into his hair. "Not if I want some of the three of you."
He murmured something that wasn't quite a yes or no against my skin. So I had to ask. "You okay with that?"
Sean went quiet against me and much as I wanted to fill that silence, I didn't. When he finally spoke, he sounded surprised by his own words, "Yeah. Yeah, I am." He trailed a line of kisses up my chest and then bit down on my shoulder before whispering in my ear, "Although it doesn't sound like you've had enough inspiration yet."
I chuckled as I ran my his hands up and down his sides. "Trust me, elskede, you more than inspire me."
He looked at me then, gave me a bright smile that made me sorry I didn't have a camera at hand to capture it. "Hmm. Well, I suppose it's not Tuesday then."
Tuesday? "No, it's...Thursday." Damn it. Was there something I was supposed to do next Tuesday? Something he'd be annoyed to have to remind me about? I almost groaned. Or something I forgot to do last?
"No, wait." Sean's brow furrowed as he ran his fingers through his hair. "It's a good thing that it's not Tuesday. Possibly."
Good thing? Hmmm, then I didn't forget something. Except I must have, because Sean was talking like I should know what he meant, but I didn't. So I asked. "What are you talking about?"
"You know, the Blades aren't playing today."
Soccer... Fuck. Was I supposed to tape a game for him? "I suppose not," I said slowly, "or we wouldn't be having this conversation." I watched him closely, searching for some clue about where this was going. "You'd be watching the game."
"Mmm. And you'd be pissing me off, suddenly desperate to talk after being silent for hours." His fingers slipped into my hair as he pulled me to him for a deep lingering kiss.
I laughed and agreed with him. Bastard knew me too well by far. But my heart wasn't in it. It was way far back in line behind all the other parts of me that were fixed on Sean's tugging me back into our bed and fucking me into blissful exhaustion.
"You're in denial." He whispered the words against my lips.
"What? About soccer?"
"Football. That too. But I meant your tendency to pick truly inappropriate moments to talk about world events." He watched me carefully, a slight shake of my hear and he knew I had no idea where this was going. "You want him." Sean's fingers were still in my hair, stroking, and I had to fight to keep my eyes open as I asked him who. He chuckled and nipped at my lip. "The man hell-bent on destroying my car."
"Dave?" I shook my head. "No. Don't need him."
"I didn't say 'need'. I said 'want'. Don't you listen?" The slightest edge of exasperation crept into his voice as he ran his fingers through his hair. "No, wait, I know the answer to that one."
I just stared at him for some time that I hoped wasn't shorter than it felt to me. "Fine." I shrugged. "I've looked a time or two."
"I know. I'm remarkably not blind. You want. And it's not Tuesday, I'm not watching the game, and I'm here." Sean's voice dropped to that soft, dark purr on his last words, a sound that always cut through me, made me shiver. I had to remind myself to breathe as his lips brushed mine, while his fingers caressed the nape of my neck.
"You're..." When my voice faltered, I cleared my throat, wet my lips, and tried again. "You're assuming he'd even be interested."
Sean snorted and shook his head. "I told her you're oblivious." He blushed, just a little, as he coughed and looked away from me.
"I'm...? You told...?" The piece clicked into place. "Miranda." I blinked, shook my head slightly. "The two of you talked about Dave and I fucking?"
"What?" It was Sean's turn to blink. "No, you daft Yank! Christ, I'm going to give up talking to you, and just leave notes on the fridge."
Okay, so maybe the piece didn't quite fit.
"Try and follow, all right?" His hands closed around mine as he met my eyes, waiting until he was sure he had my attention. "Miranda and I didn't talk about you and Dave. I may have"-a pause as he closed his eyes, frowning as he searched for the right words--mmm, mentioned you in conversation. Not you and Dave."
Mentioned...me? But not Dave. What were they talking about? Sean wasn't going to tell me. I wondered if Miranda would.
Sean sighed, then nodded. I knew from his look that nod was in response to something he was thinking, not directed toward me. He locked his gaze with mine. "But I can see that he wants you. Just as much as you want him -- maybe more. So take him."
"Take him?" I closed my eyes, my hands tightening around Sean's as I remembered the feeling of Dave just barely touching me in the driveway. Tempting. Maybe too tempting. "Take him. Just like that?"
"Does it have to be any more complicated than that?"
Complicated? Everything about Sean was complicated now. The worst kind of complicated too. The kind that looks so obvious and easy on the surface, and you never realize how wrong that is until it's too late. I shrugged and gave him a small smile. "I'll think about it."
"Of course." Sean leaned close, his breath ghosting across my lips, though he didn't quite kiss them. He waited for me to open my eyes before adding. "It is a limited time offer, though, love." Never as simple as it seems on the surface. "We talked about this. I'm not comfortable with leaving it open at all times."
I nodded, though I wasn't sure what he meant. I was only sure that I couldn't afford to fuck up.
Maybe Sean knew that, sensed it, because he cleared his throat. "Not without me. You said."
That was easy enough to agree to. Well, technically, I already had earlier in the garden, though that was in less specific terms. "Never without you."
Sean smiled, it was a one of the genuinely happy ones that made the corners of his eyes crinkle. "Good, then." Freeing one hand from mine, he ran his fingers along my jaw, brushed his thumb over my lips. "You want, you take." There was the slightest pause before he murmured. "You're damn good at that anyway. So do it."
Good at it? I don't think that I frowned. Maybe I was wrong, but I thought that following that thread of conversation might lead us to...unhappy places. And I'd been in too many of them lately to willing wander into another. "I'm going to take a shower." I brushed a light kiss across his lips. "And think about it. Okay?"
Sean nodded as he let me loose, and I stepped closer until our bodies were touching, slipped my arms around him, holding him tightly against me and I kissed him. Fierce. Hard. So sweet as his eyes drifted closed. So sweet as he sighed as our lips parted, tongue swiping across his own lips. "Love you," he murmured in a rough, husky whisper.
"Love you too, elskede. More than I can say." More than he will probably ever know.
Sean grinned as he shoved me toward the bathroom. "Go. Shower."
I promised I wouldn't use up all the hot water. I hoped Miranda and Dave would be so kind as to do the same. Honestly, I didn't think that would be a difficult promise to keep, not until I was standing under the water, hearing Sean say, Take him, as my hands moved over my body. Take him. My fingers curled around my cock, and I stroked myself as I imagined fucking Dave while Sean fucked me. Following those thoughts to their natural conclusion, however, would surely mean that Sean's shower would be less than hot. And I did promise. Sadly.
After a quick toweling off, the towel still draped over one shoulder as I rubbed at my hair, I stepped into the doorway and froze. Sean was leaning over Miranda, running his hands up her arms. She'd just said something about shagging all of them rotten, I believe. While that sounded like a nice offer to me, I'm sure that it sounded even better to Sean. He pitched his voice low as he answered her in his dark sinful "I'm going to fuck you until you can't stand" tone, though the only word I heard was "lovely," that as he shifted close enough to almost kiss her. Her lips parted, and I wondered if they would mind if I touched myself while I watched. At the last moment, Sean stiffened and pulled back, and I thought I heard my name.
When I cleared my throat, Sean whirled around. "Viggo!" He looked from me to Miranda and then back to me as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. Clearly, I was not the only one who wanted, though Sean didn't precisely want Dave.
"Please," I said, "carry on." I couldn't help laughing at the stunned looks on their faces. "Though I in the interest of fairness"-I nodded to Miranda--"I think I should go fetch Dave so he can watch too."
Miranda blinked at me, and I fought the urge to laugh. It took a lot to take Miranda off guard. Though I suppose mentioning Dave probably helped. A little.
"You're sure?" Sean was still desperately trying to look at both Miranda and I and at neither of us at the same time. My skittish elskede. When I got to his side, I wrapped an arm around him and leaned against him as I kissed him. "You wouldn't ask that if you were standing where I was watching what I was watching." However, he didn't look convinced by words alone. The sacrifices I make for him.
He watched me speculatively as I reached out with my free hand and snagged some of Miranda's hair to pull her to me. I brushed my lips across hers teasingly before I kissed her. "Though I might like to have a raincheck on that offer to shag me rotten." She gave me a look as I chuckled and nipped at her lip. "Not sure you'll be up to it after you're finished with him."
She called me an arrogant prick. Arrogant? Me? That was...unfair. I was, after all, just being honest. Direct. For some reason, Miranda didn't look convinced. Well, I suppose I would leave it to Sean to prove how honest I was being. With a last grin and a promise I wouldn't be long, I slipped out of the room.
The walk to the guest bathroom never seemed so long.
I could just see Dave's silhouette through the curtain as he hummed tunelessly over the sound of the water. It was just loud enough that he didn't notice me pull aside the curtain. Either that or he thought it was Miranda and was playing dumb. Take him.
I followed the path of the water as I watched it run down his shoulders, back, ass, thighs. It would be so easy to step in behind him, curl one hand around his cock as I bent him over to fuck him. I drew a deep breath and released it before I reached for Dave.
Take him.
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Thank you, thank you, thank you!
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I meant to work on this and get it posted weeks ago, but I could not get back into the middle of it for some reason. Oh, the tragedy! *drapes hand dramatically over her forhead*
However, I suspect it was because I wanted to skip ahead to what...ummm...comes next.
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*LOL* I don't see why not. After all, I've been busily hacking up various sections of lung in the past couple days, and had no idea that
...Is there such a thing as commenting-order etiquette? Hmm.
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Feel better soon!
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This is me frowning in concern. Tsk. ^_^
Thanks. *hugs* Two days ago was the worst day so far, so hopefully I'll be better soon.
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Moderation in all things, that's the key. *winks*
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More. Soon. From you. From your partner in crime. From both.
Or you will die.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I think that one of
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*clears throat*
Um, I meant to say that -- er -- I really admire the postmodernity of your formal choices throughout this series. Uh, yeah. That's what I meant.
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That's so good to hear because, after all, that is really what this whole thing is about. Any...umm...other side effects are completely...errr...unintended.
*nods* Yeah, just byproducts of the creative process.
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*murgle*
*grin*
~Kris
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I'm thinking the next bits will be more hot than angsty. Hope that's not a problem. ^_^
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*hugs tight* Boy did it ever. Probably the first really genuine frustration/worry/annoyance-free smile I've had since this latest fiasco began. Thank you so much.
Pride fought a quick battle with honesty and lost
That's really nice. Love that turn of phrase.
And this--
Take him.
--is just the perfect place to end, the perfect punch. Wow. Nice.
Thank you so much, Barb. This was wonderful. *hugs tight*